Hats Off to Bhookha Naan

It’s very early in the morning here. Couldn’t sleep well the whole night. We are missing a few members of our family who have gone back home. It’s always painful to see some of your own being culled and I am not in any mood for humour.

But, I am in a very respectful mood. I have new found respect for Bhookha Naan and his coterie of ill advisors. I mean, their insight into the game is par excellence. They can see things that us mortals just can’t. To begin with they select Shakespeare and Ganji Hanger for a T20 tournament. That itself was genius. And then they sack them after just one inning each. Being the ignorant fool that I am, I thought they played just as all of us had always expected them too.
But, I think Bhookha must have seen something that we couldn’t and suddenly realised that they do not fit in. I wish I could fall at their feet and pray for enlightenment. Tell me, Oh my Master, what did you see in those 2 innings that you hadn’t known all along? What startling revelation was caught by only your eyes and nobody else’s? Tell me, please tell me, your enlightened soul, how do I see things beyond what is obvious?

Unfortunately, for Shakespeare and Ganji Hanger they are genuinely nice blokes and are generally liked by everyone – within and outside the team. But look at the Bubblies. They
have played a master stroke. They have Appam Chutiya in the squad only to piss the opposition off. Imagine, you are all pumped up for the match, have worked out your strategies, and are looking forward to taking on the opposition. You reach the ground and the first sight is that of Appam Chutiya doing some strange break dance steps at the touch line. That’s enough to make every gut in your body cringe with revolt, enough to make every vein in your body burst open,
and every muscle in your body react to the extreme pungency. And right then and there, you have lost the match without even a ball being bowled. SUperb! Superb!

May be Shakespeare and Ganji Hanger need to learn some of those tricks to stay in the squad. But, it’ll take them some time to do so. Becoz “impression ek din mein nahin banta”.

A few hundred kms away, the Bevdaas have problems of a different kind. Their rock star Peter Ka Beta, now known as Re-Peter, is all set to repeat their performance of last season. In fact, they may go one step better this time. What else do u expect when you sign on a star, make him captain, allow him to play only a few matches, forgive him forgetting his own players’ names, have fun at ur expense and then return home with a fat pay cheque. Some guys have all the luck, don’t they?

Somebody please teach the new age cricket bosses, that building a cricket team is slightly different from selling liquor or masala movies. It takes time, patience, clarity of thought, a sense of belongingness, a common sense of purpose, a clear strategy and much more. It’s like nurturing a family. In team sport, the team is not the management that creates the product. The team IS the product. Create the product as if it’s your own baby. And it will give you pleasure for a lifetime!

I rest my case. Thank you.

P.S. The dirty work of informing the said players was left to the hired top management of the franchise, although the decision was taken by the Phoren Babas. Everyone’s been instructed to keep their mouths shut on the issue, including the sacked players. But let me tell you, the players have not taken this culling too lightly. Mangal Pandey is especially pissed off. So far things are very muted, but an implosion is definitely on the cards. Can’t tell you more as many players are involved, some of whom are good friends of mine.

P.P.S. Now we have 11 Indians from whom 7 will be selected and 9 foreigners from whom 4 will be selected. Ratios and Proportions have taken an entirely new meaning for me. I am learning soooo much on this tour that it’s not funny.

P.P.P.S. Initially, I was concerned as I thought they have been sacked on suspicions of being me. But when they spoke to all of us, I was relieved that it has nothing to do with Fake IPL.

1017 Responses to “Hats Off to Bhookha Naan”


  • im the big fan of ganguly. for him only still i support kkr.

  • Chaddi Cricketer Dada

    IPL & a Chaddi CricketerIPL & a Chaddi CricketerIPL & a Chaddi CricketerChaddi Cricketer Lordie's is similar story to labour Unionism in Bengal. In a factory when a worker joins- Will not perform- getting paid for no work is his birthright- resorts to unionism if you try to remove him- Starts Cholbe na Korbe naHere also- Chaddi Dada was not performing as Captain or player- He expects to be treated like a star irrespective of his performance.- When removed from Captaincy, resorted to group alongwith his chamchas.- BoriaBistar zumdar Bhendi TV etc.- Met CPM leaders Torned Speaker Bomnath ..Kharrrrrr…Fakje IPL player- Rubbed Pawar;s … lolNet resultThese commie Bongs have screwed the industry in Bengal and now screwing cricket in Bengal and India. also.Last year Chaddi DADA and bongs enjoyed SRK Bhookha literally Honeymoon all Bengal Dada Fake IPL Player were in ecstasy .This year parted away lol.. so calling him names.Chaddi hangerWhen short ball is bowled his Chaddi slips. This happened today also.Chaddi Dada 1 run in 8 ballsKumar to Chaddi Dada, OUT, and the short ball works again, how many times in this man's career have we seen him succumb to that, even I've lost count! After the fuller slower ball, PK changes up with a short delivery on the stumps and Ganguly makes a real mess of that, just lobbing it over the infield and straight to the man running in from the deep midwicket boundary, easiest catch he'll getChaddi drops from this Chaddi hanger Lordie Dada.Forget about that Chaddi Hanger Dada.He is root cause of failure of KKR.He is a main distraction.If they make LR Shukla or Dinda, Saha etc captain still winning rate will improve but remove that cry baby DadaAnd stop comparing him with Dravid Sachin Sehwag Laxman . They are class apart.Leave them Bhookha Bengal Sookha Kangal.Ratan Tata waited too long and made loss.Now SRK repeating waiting too long will make huge losses.With these fools you can make only losses.Stay away from these fools who think they are intelligent and come out with theories.Leave them Bhookha Bengal Sookha Kangal.No solutions in real life.Captaincy series wins abroad against quality oppositionPataudi one series winBedi and Wadekar 2 Series wins each against mighty of their times.Azar Chaddi Dada one each against quality oppositiombut Chaddi Lordie's Captaincy only series win gainst PAK abroad was shared so credit is devided between Dravid and Ganguly.Dhoni and Gavaskar one each against mighty side of their times Australia.Verdict- Chaddi Cricketer Dada was not most successful captain as projected by eastern journo and fans. As he captained for much lomger time with support of then Dalmiya. But he could not achieve what Bedi, Wadekar, Dhoni, Gavaskar achieved in shorter duration as captain.Now greatest Chaddiwala Zalimulian Dada period full of Zimbabwe Bangla Desh winsSeries win against quality opposition nil. How can we say him greatest ever captain?Captaincy series wins abroad against quality oppositionPataudi one series winBedi and Wadekar 2 Series wins each against mighty of their times.Azar Chaddi Cricketer Lordie Dada one each against quality oppositiombut Chaddi Captaincy only series win gainst PAK abroad was shared so credit is devided between Dravid and Chaddi.Dhoni and Gavaskar one each against mighty side of their times Australia.Verdict- Chaddi Lordie the Chaddi Cricketer was not most successful captain as projected by eastern journo and fans. As he captained for much lomger time with support of then Dalmiya. But he could not achieve what Bedi, Wadekar, Dhoni, Gavaskar achieved in shorter duration as captain.Chaddi Lordie Dada facing pacers on placid wickets. Lol…Pak test scene…42.3 Shoaib Akhtar to Chaddi , no run, moves outside leg stump, Shoaib sends a slower one on the stumps, tapped to backward point42.4 Shoaib Akhtar to Chhaddi Dada, 1 no ball, Ah! Drama. Ganguly moved outside leg stump and Shoaib followed him with a bouncer and Ganguly ducked and fell over on his backsideDADA COUNTING STARS IN BROAD DAY LIGHT.. FIGHTING ON EQUAL TERMS.42.4 Shoaib Akhtar to Chaddi Cricketer, OUT, Again he backs away, Shoaib fires in a full pitched delivery on the leg stump, Ganguly misses to connect with his heave and the leg stump is pegged back. Kumble has declared.SC Ganguly b Shoaib Akhtar 46 (58b 4×4 0×6) SR: 79.31Now Australia on flat pitch and old ball …61.5 Lee to Cgaddi Lordie Ganguly, no run, good bouncer, quick and angling towards the batsman, had Chaddi Cricketer Ganguly at sea there as he took his eyes off the ball61.6 Lee to Chaddi Dada Ganguly, OUT, Ganguly attempts a big hit but mistimes it, Lee delivers from round the wicket and lands it on a full length, Ganguly makes room for the loft but miscues it to Clarke at cover, it was in the air for a while SC Ganguly c Clarke b Lee 27 (37b 2×4 0×6) SR: 72.97Now in IPL Kumar like rookies are threatening him with short pitched stuff.Why Chaddi Lordie Dada is tame drawn test scorer?131 Drawn v Eng 1996 at Lord's balls played 301 strike rate136 Drawn v Eng 1996 at Nottingham balls played 361 strike rate147 Drawn v Sri Lanka 1997 at Colombo balls played 427 strike rate109 Drawn v Sri Lanka 1997/98 at Mohali balls played strike rate173 Drawn v Sri Lanka 1997/98 at Mumbai balls played strike rate101* Drawn v NZ 1998/99 at Hamilton balls played strike rate125 Drawn v NZ 1999/00 at Ahmedabad balls played strike rate100* Drawn v NZ 2003/04 at Ahmedabad balls played strike rate144 Drawn v Aus at Brisbane balls played strike rate100 Drawn v BD 2007 at Chittagong balls played strike rate102 Drawn v Pak 2007/08 at Kolkata balls played strike rate238 Drawn v Pak 2007/08 at Benglore balls played strike rateIndia won 38 tests since 1996 and see his contribution to wins.Theonly three innings innings caused India win see the quality.136 Win v Zim 2001/02 at Delhi balls played strike rateNo comments other than as always great innings against minnows.101 Win v Zim 2005/06 at Bulawayo balls played strike rateLaxman made 140 ran out in mixup with Saurav Ganguly128 Win v Eng 2002 at Leeds balls played strike rateOnly century caused against quality opposition.Here Dravid scored 148 Sachin scored193 in the match Dada also made hay while sunshines.Corrigendum as data was few months oldFinally The greatest Chaddi Lordie scored century for winning cause lol..A technology demonstration that he can cross magical figure of 100 in win against quality opposition at home.Hurray all boka’sKitana bhi Gaand patkao Chaddi can not be compared with Sachin Dravid Sehwag and Dhoni.Chaddi Lordie Sir Chaddi Cricketer the Bangla standard in ODI win Now let us see the effort and against which side124 v Pakistan Dhaka 1998 …..Tendulkar 41 in 26 balls RR singh 83 runs105 v New Zealand Sharjah 1998 …..sachin 40 Azar 32 , Agarkar 35/4109 v Sri Lanka Colombo (RPS) 1998 …..Tendulkar 128 , Agarkar 53/4130*v Sri Lanka Nagpur 1999……. Agarkar 14/3 Ganguly 4/4 seems real single handed sort.183 v Sri Lanka Taunton 1999….. Dravid 145 RR Singh 31/5153*v New Zealand Gwalior 1999 …..seems real single handed sort141 v Pakistan Adelaide 2000 Sachin 41 in 46 balls Dravid 32 Kumble 40/4105*v South Africa Jamshedpur 2000……Match Fixing period no comments141*v South Africa Nairobi 2000……Match Fixing period no comments117*v England Colombo 2002 …….Sehwag 126112*v Namibia Pietermaritzburg 2003 ….Namibia King107*v Kenya Cape Town 2003 ……prince against Kenya111*v Kenya Durban 2003……Tiger roaring against Kenya111 v Kenya Paarl 2001……Prince of Kenya against Kenya107*v Zimbabwe Bulawayo 1998 Azar 72 ….. King against Zimbabwe139 v Zimbabwe Nairobi 1999 Singh 41 Ramesh 31 ….Dada against Zimbabwe144 v Zimbabwe Ahmedabad 2000 …..A Legend against Zimbabwe135*v Bangladesh Dhaka 2000 …..Ami to Bangla KingSome facts — Was it a great innings?Chaddi Cricketer the Sir Chaddi Bangla Lordie scoring 144 against Australia to save match.Fact is bowlers were Gillespie MacGill ,bracken, Waugh ,KatichNo Macgrath Lee or Warne.1 st day —– Match started late due to rain on ended early bad light. Two rain interruptions in between2 nd day —— Match started late due to bad weather on ended early bad light. Good interruptions in between.3 rd day —— half an hour play due to bad light and rain4 th day —— play ended early Ganguly scored century at tea in conditions it was clear can not be played for result.5 th day —– play started late ended as draw with mutual consent of captains.How this can be match saving innings when everybody knew that there wont be result. Indian first inning ended on fifth dayDid Chaddi Cricketer The Sir Chaddi Bangla Lordie took us to world cup finals? 2003 World CupAgainst major oppositions where opening partnership was spoiled by Chaddi Crickter Ganguly8 v New Zealand at Paarl9 v Aus at Centurion19 v Eng at Durban0 v Pak at48 v Srilanka at Johannesburg3 v NZ at Centurion24 v Aus at JohannesburgAnd now look Tiger against minnows112 not out v Nam at Pietermaritzburg107 not out v Ken at Cape Town111 not out v Ken at Durban24 v Zim at HarareNot out against minnows to swell averages but mediocre batting performance. Now go and find out why we went to Finals who scored there? Keniya went to semis as England and New Zealand surrendered matches and points as protest against Zimbabwe regime for their safety. And those were supposed to be played there in Zimbabwe.and as England and New Zealand surrendered their matches in protest against Zim regime Kenya came to semis. The Chaddi Bangla Lordie The Chaddi Cricketer Ganguly is worser than rookies of 20-20 like Sharma Yusuf Uthappa and GambhirGangulyChaddi Lordie The Chaddie cricketer Bangla PrinceWadekarCaptained 16 matchesWins 4 quality 0 minnowsLosses 4 quality 0 minnowsQuality win loss ratio 50 : 50KapildevCaptained 34 matchesWins 4 quality 0 minnowsLosses 7 quality 0 minnowsQuality win loss ratio 36 : 64AzharuddinCaptained 47 matchesWins 13 quality opposition 1 minnowsLosses 13 quality 1 minnowsQuality win loss ratio 50 : 50Minnows booster Saurav ChaddopadhyayCaptained 49 matchesWins 12 quality 9 minnowsLosses 12 quality 1 minnowsQuality win loss ratio 50 : 50DravidCaptained 25 matchesWins 8 quality 1 minnowsLosses 6 quality 0 minnowsQuality win loss ratio 57 : 43Indians solo fighters for team scoring tons while loosing in Test cricketIndia lost 78 tests since 1996Sachin 9 tons solo fights for team Aus 4 SA 2 Eng Pak NZ one eachDravid 1 tons solo fights against Zim oneLaxman 2 tons solo fights against Aus twoSehwag 3 tons solo fights against Aus Pak SA one eachand the last Sir Chaddi Lordie the great Bangla Chaddi Cricketer uted no solo fight.These are either solo or sizable resistances while loosing others have not contrubeted enough so we lost. He scores when others soften balling by their pounding. Then the vulture comes to grab the kill' The Chaddi ' erected to honour Chaddi Lordie The Great Bangla Chaddi CricketerWhen you walk into the Eden Garden Stadium next time, a major landmark of Kolkata, you will certainly not miss 'Chaddi'.Made of 10 mtr cloth bricks, this 1 feet high and 4 ft wide structure, erected just a few steps into the stadium with broken helmet,Arm Guard Chest Guard, abdomen guard, Back Guard, like all protective armoury against medium of higher paced bowlers from world over is a unique tribute to home-born Chaddi cricketer Saurav Ganguly, who made it big hype in world cricket with the help of bangla media and commie politicians..The Chaddi Cricketer The Sir Chaddi Bangla Lordie Ganguly’s is similar story to labour Unionism in Bengal. In a factory when a worker joins- Will not perform- getting paid for no work is his birthright- resorts to unionism if you try to remove him- Starts Cholbe na Korbe naHere also- Dada was not performing as Captain or player- He expects to be treated like a star irrespective of his performance.- When removed from Captaincy, resorted to group alongwith his chamchas.- BoriaBistar zumdar Bhendi TV etc.- Met CPM leaders Torned Speaker Bomnath ..Kharrrrrr…Fakje IPL player- Rubbed Pawar;s … lolNet resultThese commie Bongs have screwed the industry in Bengal and now screwing cricket in Bengal and India. also.Last year DADA and bongs enjoyed SRK literally Honeymoon all Bengal Dada Fake IPL Player were in ecstasy .

  • This is for DADA. Dada if you are reading this can you plz take my advice and I am sure alot of ppl will agree. RETIRE!!! What are you waiting for, to be kicked out. Pls leave before all the lovely memories of your past glory are forgotten cause you were stupid enough to stay past your prime. Join Harsha in the box if you like but kindly leave the game for others. Sunil

  • you rock i m proud of you as you show sharukh and specially john there real place . all the best you are our hero.shilp mohan gupta

  • please say who you are man!it’s really quizzing us.please do it soon.

  • i suppose u have a new career choice dude…u can get into writing stuff… Maybe u should have realised playing cricket is not your forte a little bit early…but good stuff dude..keep it going… throw the imaginery stinky gossip out into the open… there are lots of fools like me to keep track of the shit that u throw at us..lol :)

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