True to their name, the Weapons of Self Destruction – Al Pakeezah – are at it again. Captain No-Use Khan (earlier known as Bhindi) and Coach are arguing and babbling like 2 teenaged girls fighting over one guy. Their team meeting before the all-important game against the Oranges was all about the two of them contradicting each other, giving arguments countering the others’ point of view, and trying to prove who’s the boss. Basically, confusing the hell out of the rest of the 14 guys, who’s combined IQ doesn’t add up to 140. Imagine the plight of people like Kumar Bull. God gave them enough brains to just about follow one simple point of view. They are used to intructions like “Take ball, bowl at stumps”. Any extra information leads to wides and no-balls. Now they are in the highly unenviable position where they need to decipher an argument, understand what makes sense and then decide their own course of action. For this bunch of AK-47s, this is as tough a task as sending Man to Moon.
To summarise the arguments between captain and coach: No-use Khan wants the failed warlord to open, the coach doesn’t. Coach wants Mr. Missed-Bah-5-Runs to bat at 4, No-use doesn’t. No-use wants Left-arm-grenade-hurler to play, Coach doesn’t. No-use Khan wants Kumar Bull to open the bowling (or balling as he calls it), Coach doesn’t. No-use Khan wants Yasir Fatafat out, but Coach wants him in. All-in-all, the team’s approach is quite representative of their country’s in this case.
All of them have already come to terms with their future in the Championships. And now, many of them are eyeing the captaincy of the side. No-Use Khan has decided to give an ultimatum to his board to choose between him and the coach. He may resign from captaincy after they return to their country. He has years of experience to fall back upon, after all he has quit captaincy more number of times than he has led his country.
The Coach is backing Mr. Missed-bah-5-Runs as the captain. His argument being that he is intelligent, well-behaved, educated and speaks better English than No-Use Khan. At least he won’t make a fool of himself at the post-match interview even if performances on the field don’t change much.
Failed warlord is also eyeing the captaincy. He is proposing the idea of 2 separate captains for test matches and limited overs cricket. As if the team wasn’t confused enough already. The coach has told him to bide him time for the captaincy. After all, he has all the time in his hands. Last I heard, he was still 21 yrs old.
Am off to Lord’s now to see who’s calling the shots for this match – Captain or Coach. Or would they adopt a compromise formula where the Captain has his way with 2 decisions and the coach has his way for the others? We’ll know very soon.
I like you blogs and I will keep coming back to read your blogs. I find your recent blogs are compulsive and a far cry from the FIP I used to read
You are Himesh Reshammiya of blog world. Jsut rubbish. He is a nasal singer and you are an analgesic blogger. It's guys like you who hurts a team, working on the lines of 'rift' b/w Sehwag and Dhoni and magnify such issues for your dirty self vested interest. Help cricket to flourish here if at all you can other than bashing your employee and yeah, don't forget to dream about playing cricket.
a
If you worry about our countrys future please see this blog http://www.winningindianelections.blogspot.com
SOB of a bitch…what was rigged?
Hilarious posts! Love your blog. This is the first time I'm commenting. Mr. Missed-bah-5-Runs can probably be referred to as Mr. Missed-5-Runs-bah!
As even you would acknowledge, this time it lacks the sting that made it so fascinating during IPL. But anyway, i simply love ur blog, and admire ur hold on english language. Ur nicknames are absolutely hilarious! How do u hit upon them. Mis-bah-5-runs is simbly superb.
But keep continuing ur blog, there will always be readers like us.U can take pot-shots at not only cricketers but u can broaden ur field, bcoz everyone knows it is fake but this is just mast time-pass. Also keep updating more frequently.
Really sad man… that made a pathetic read.. a suggestion … stop crapping!!!!!
Why cant someone hack this blog?
afridi wants captaincy!!! good lord, in any other sensible team they would hav chucked him out years ago… agreed he gives an inspired performance now and then, but its still below par considering the experience he has had… Btw none of those chutiya's speak proper english how do they plan to pick up girls (sign language perhaps..) or maybe seeing a girl not wearing a burkha must be highly stimulating for them…
dude do some proper sleuthing and research and then write the coming articles… the kick u had in the starting articles seems to be missing… i think u can get google ads for ur blog, it might pay for ur trips and reconnaissance… pls strive to keep the blog and our interest in it alive…
Wanna see Sachin Tendulkar's first interview??
have a look at this post
http://cricket-true-or-not.blogspot.com/
Please post comments after seeing it.
it's really funny that a person from a country who's english accent is most critisized around the world is making fun of younis :S
I think Sanjay Jha is talking about The Mole and not FIP
lode, achcha kiya tune mera post delete kiya. atleast pata chale ki tu online hai. to phir, aab tak choosa nahi t20worlcupmole ka?
Guys….my friend the media guy told me some interesting things….
1) FIP is not a player….is someone from media
2) KKR team selection was 1st printed in some Bengali newspaper in Kolkata/WB & this guy just made a delicious curry from it.
3) FIP guy is mostly making stories out of rumors or not significant things & just spin it into ways to make is look nice.
He also mention to me that there was a nice fact why Symonds was going at Pandey in IPL final….but I guess the media guy..I mean FIP miss the whole story & hence cant bring the story as nice read gossip.
Well….he also told me that under UK laws…they cant actually charge him under anything (can they do that under anyway..since the guy is just blogging anyway)
more later…cheers
Guys the t20worldcupmole has a new post , check it out.
So he is not caught yet!!
how is it going FIP??
Honestly post more often plzzz
"Any guesses on how long before the IPL takes over the cricketing world?". Looks like very soon. See how many player injured/unfit during IPL and missing the t20 world cup.
How I wish there were some more interesting blogs which discussed cricket and their aspects rather than this kind of bullshit. This (and other such) forums has such a nice base of cricket followers that we, as audiences, can use the base to voice our opinions and demand what is rightfully ours. Just as a couple of examples:
1. The strategic breaks in IPL. Complete no no as we lose so much interest. The lack of such a break in the world cup is such a reliever.
2. The fact that Star Sports cricket quality coverage has actually gone down so drastically. You cannot, and let me capitalize CANNOT, at any cost, show a 5 ball over. I was shocked to see star cricket actually resuming the coverage after a ball was bowled. Even one let up is not tolerable. Second, you have to show the replay of the wicket that has fallen before you go on a commercial break. You cannot do it after you return, shameful to say so but Sony was better in this aspect. You also cannot show ads in the sidebar while a ball is being bowled !!! K'mon star cricket – we were looking forward to your coverage and you're totally letting us down. Harsha boss – I know u cant but just so hope you can do something.
I'm posting the above post on all three forums that I'm following – FIP / AIP / T20WCM. And am seriously hoping we can raise some sort of a relevant voice to demand rightful coverage of a game that's so dear to us.
Suggestion:
Kamran Akmal – Kam Akal, Kuwara Khatmal
@ above….
& I remember IPL use Setman IPL broadcast quality as excuse to cancel their rights initially & were looking for ESPN-Star to fill in.
Imagine…….all the extra add laden 4 ball over with popup adds inbetween 4 balls…..& the commentary pitch…the starting over…being Nike Over…with 5th ball being amush marketing by Addidas
Yeah,,i agree with what vishal says…I do remember the ads that used to come running onto the tv screens immediately after the bowler bowls the 6th ball, during the DOORDARSHAN times… and the telecast resumes after the first ball is bowled…
many of us get irritated when,,the channel comes out with an ad right after a wicket falls,,
All those who are criticising this blog should stop wasting their time. It is not mandatory to read the blog. It is your own choice. So if you dont like what FIP is writing you are free to get lost and stop visiting. Its as simple as that.
FIP u r doing gr88!! kee it up!
FIP,
Dude all your traffic is going to the t20worldcupmole dude , please post something. Did you also wonder into a gay bar or what? No post for 4 days??
FIP is a fucking racist prick, who makes up bullshit.
What you are is a racist coward. Typical Indian I bet. You can't say shit to any of the "Dicks" or "Al-Pakeezahs" players' faces, so you hide behind a fake name, and are a true keyboard warrior. Seriously dude, grow some fucking balls and admit who you are, then try writing some of this shit, when players know who you are.
dear FIP, very well written as usual,why call raina na braina? he is such a sweet momma boys like.. I look at him and remember all cute baba log of my colony totally devoted to their mommas…lol at kakdi!! cool name,,,,I am glad that u r back, I had asked u to make another blog as faket20player!!! anyways urs is the only blog i read and keep up the good effort, please lambaste people more more juice and more cunningness
Dear FIP, I donot know why the pakistanis donot take a crash course in english .its not the toughest language all of them while talking in the match presentation ceremony or pre match press conference talk rubbish. I cudnt believe my ears when younis khan sid before the match with england tht the match was not crucial for them but was for the english!! also after losing the warm up game agst india he talked utter nonsense!
why doesnt he spit before talking? bad english plus bad diction ugh
dear FIP, very well written as usual,why call raina na braina? he is such a sweet momma boys like.. I look at him and remember all cute baba log of my colony totally devoted to their mommas…lol at kakdi!! cool name,,,,I am glad that u r back, I had asked u to make another blog as faket20player!!! anyways urs is the only blog i read and keep up the good effort, please lambaste people more more juice and more cunningness
sory looks like i have commented wrongly:
this was what I meant
Dear FIP, I donot know why the pakistanis donot take a crash course in english .its not the toughest language all of them while talking in the match presentation ceremony or pre match press conference talk rubbish. I cudnt believe my ears when younis khan sid before the match with england tht the match was not crucial for them but was for the english!! also after losing the warm up game agst india he talked utter nonsense!
why doesnt he spit before talking? bad english plus bad diction ugh
"all he has quit captaincy more number of times than he has led his country.""
HILLARIOUS
"after all he has quit captaincy more number of times than he has led his country."
HILLARIOUS
m i the frst to post????
DUDE…YOU DID NOT LEARN PISSING LESSON UP UNTIL IPL.
THERE U WERE PISSING IN YOUR OWN BACKYARD. NOW U PISSING GLOBALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
u indian basterds..u r ugly…short…n smell like shit
hey FIP welcome back, dont forget yusuf this time
somebody tell the al pakezaah captain to spit before talking!
so much saliva makes me puky
your creativity has a bit down but still its intersting
Hey fucker!
You should be having enough courage and guts to let my comments add a little bit of humour and spice to your dead blog.
Hey Fucker,
How is it going so far? I hope your once in a blue moon team should visit windy&rainy Leicester..to swallow dicks
and you have to keep us posted!
one thing to add – these guys also "take a ghan and target (w)hole(s). Please stay safe! as I heard that they carry AK 811 (;) range of 8 " to 11")
Lolzz … Kumar bull and the instructions tht he u'stnds!!!
Ha ha ha ha …
Keep the comemnts comin in …
Now this post is even funnier since India is iut and Pakistan, with all its shortcomings, is still a contendor. This very pigheaded arrogance led to India's departure which can be sensed in this post. Bye bye India. Have a safe flight.
not posted from long.. maa c**d g**i kya Bh**we ….
i think you got your fitting answer
the person who calls every body stupid is the real stupid
i heard it long time ago.
today i read the real example
i am sure that last night dildo will stay in your ass for long time
asshole
sorry to team india who really deserved to win
Guess whose won the worldcup? Take this as a lesson man. No Use Khan turned out to be useful after all. The bowler you made fun of turned out to be the highest wicket taker and and warlord gave two match winning performances that ordinary players can only dream of …
I used to be a big fan of your writing, but the use of anti-pakistan rhetoric just to appease the egos of some crazed lunatics was totally uncalled for. I know you make fun of Indian players as well, but reading this post and then reading some of the comments of my Indian friends was a real eye opener. I never knew such hatred existed … And its people like you and those a-holes in the media who are responsible for propogating such hatred.
An advise to all the Indians and Pakistanis .. stop fighting and learn to live peacefully!!